Jeff Foxworthy...no it's not about Rednecks (sort of)...


Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canadians:

The saddest part... I can relate to them all.

  • If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Canada.
  • If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Canada.
  • If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Canada.
  • If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialled a wrong number, you may live in Canada.
  • If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Detroit for the weekend, you may live in Canada.
  • If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Canada.
  • If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Canada.
  • If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day, and back again, you may live in Canada.
  • If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Canada.
  • If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada.
  • If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada.
  • If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Canada.
  • If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km -- You're going 95 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada.
  • If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Canada.
  • If you know all 4 seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you may live in Canada.
  • If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Canada.
  • If you find -2 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Canada.
  • If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your friends, you definitely are Canadian, and proud to be.

Comments

Beatriz said…
Hey you could be Texan if you measure distance in hours :) Those are funny! I need to find the email I have of this but for El Pasoans. Have a good day.
Joshua said…
*Dairy Queen - This happens in North Chicago, too. Growing up sucked because I always wanted ice cream, not just in the summer.

*Deer - Or you live in South Dakota. True story: Twice in one week. Nice family vacation.

-Joshua
Brian Miller said…
lol. err...my wife knows how to use jumper cables...
@SA - It's so true - when someone does ask where I live? I respond "2 hours west of Toronto".

@Joshua - I'm glad you understand my pain of wanting a Blizzard in January, just not the shitty weather kind. Wow, you must be Canadian too if you've killed that many deer. LOL!

@Brian - Hmmm? If not Canadian - redneck perhaps? Kidding - smiles...
Rebecca S. said…
That is a great list! The only one I can't relate to is driving fast in the snowstorm. No way - mind you, the roads in BC are a lot curvier than in Ontario - and I've already slid off the road enough times to last me forever!

I guess I'm a true Canadian because I don't see any of those points on the list as a negative.

Cheers!
JennAventures said…
you may also be from Lexington Michigan (just south of Sarnia)!
Sweet. I can relate to all. Only in Canada eh!
Mike said…
* If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Canada.

* If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day, and back again, you may live in Canada.

Both of these actually apply to North Carolina, especially the heat to AC one!
*krystyn* said…
ha! that's good. I measure time in hours though...i'm not Canadian...but close!!
Excellent! Makes me miss home a bit. A Canadian in Ghana is surely out of place when the seasons her are summer, summer, hot and hotter...
Anonymous said…
I measure distance in hours as well. I live 1 hour away from my parents, my bf lives 4 hours away (too far haha), and about 15 min walk from university! LOL the distance doesn't really matter to me. It's how long it takes to get there! :P

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