Journey & Adventure

I wish I could be positive about today, but the poo emoji sums up my day nicely. I hope everyone else has had a great day.

First the Public Service Announcement: The opinions expressed here are my own. I’m not saying all men experience these symptoms, there are a few in my life that do, so I speak from experience. Whether real or perceived symptoms, they are a problem for me. If you are a sensitive man (or woman) – get over yourself, as I’m tired of dealing with your hissy fits. So, I’ve noticed a trend… just like women, men experience PMS. My boss is a perfect example of this – his severe monthly mood swings, outbursts and hissy fits for no apparent reason, coupled with moments of over the top cheeriness and random acts of thoughtfulness. I’ve been working here for almost five years now and although, it’s not at necessarily the same time every month, it happens just the same. This is not a segregated sensation sweeping the nation - I’ve also noticed this trend with the other men in my life. J and The Boy are prone to this behavior as well, as I’m sure many other men. Men just don’t realize it’...

It’s days like this that make me understand how petty people can be. It’s days like this that make me understand that people can be ugly. Not in physical appearance but in personality. It’s days like this that make me wonder how certain individuals can be so narrow-minded and inconsiderate of other people’s feelings. It’s those same days that make me wonder how they’ve gotten so far in life. It’s days like this I’m thankful for my upbringing, my manners and being taught that the world does not revolve around me. It’s days like this I’m thankful I’ve instilled those same manners and morals in my son. It’s days like this that I realize that I’m a decent human being in comparison to many. It’s days like this that I lose my faith in humanity. It’s also days like this that strengthens my resolve to make the world a better place. It’s days like this I look forward to the smile and warmth that my family provides me. It’s days like this that make me appreciate the little thi...

After my last post, I've refocused my energy on the things in my life that really matter... it's the little things that are the most important...everything else is just a waste of my energy. Don't get me wrong, I will continue to complain about people and things on occasion...just not today.

I say this to myself every…single…morning.  There are days when it works beautifully and then there are days, like yesterday and today when things are not working out as planned.  *sigh* The days start off on the positive side but then work happens, people happen, reality happens and shit happens.   I’ve always been fairly proud of my ability to shed the toxic people from my life, but today, I may be one of them.  I’m down right cranky.  Shame on me.    So, with that said, I’m self-imposing solitude by shutting my office door, not answering the phone, keeping off social media and generally not making eye contact with anyone.  I’m choosing to be happy and I’m damn well gonna like it.

For those that have been following this blog for awhile, you know that I have a terrible history for staying at one job for a long period of time. Other than my favorite boss, whom I stayed with for 12 years and where I’d still be if it wasn’t for a non-solicitation clause in his employment agreement that kicked in after a corporate take-over, I’ve never lasted in a job position for more than 3 years. Yep, since 2000, I’ve worked for 6 different employers. I have varying reasons for why I left and moved on – everything from earning more money, needing more challenges, stupid co-workers, unbearable bosses, to extreme boredom and no work. The list goes on. I’m hopeless in the sense that I can’t seem to find my career groove. I’ll toot my own horn and say that I’m really good at what I do, but tend to get bored, easily if not engaged. I liked to be challenged, but not micro-managed. I like the freedom to make decisions on my own, but also like knowing that if I need guidance o...

Do you ever have that creeping feeling of impending doom, butterflies in your stomach for no reason, or that something’s just not quite right in the Universe, or maybe the stars aren’t quite aligned? I usually feel at peace with myself, but not lately. For the last couple of weeks, I’ve felt “off”. I can’t pinpoint where exactly these feelings are coming from, but I know that something’s amiss. I just can’t seem to relax. I almost feel like I’ve forgotten something, but I can’t for the life of me figure out what that something might be. Work has been busy as usual, but not enough to make me feel like this. Home life is fine – not busy there either. Life is less stressful since J has been home taking care of the daily chores and our to-do list is slowly shrinking, so it’s not that nagging at me. I’m not sure what it might be, but one thing’s for sure…I don’t like it.  Does anyone know if diet can make you feel anxious? I haven’t been eating the best – too many summe...

I’m constantly perplexed at how I could have possibly made so many bad career choices over the years that I am now once again sitting at the crossroads of disconbobulation and quagmiredness. Yeah, I don’t know what it means either, but it pretty much sums up how my job has been making me feel for at least the last six months. Oh well, life goes on and I’ll manage to get through this. It helps knowing that it’s only a means to an end… Perplexed Definition: (i) filled with uncertainty; (ii) full of difficulty; Disconbobulated Definition: when something odd happens and you get an indescribable confused feeling. Quagmire Definition: (i) soft miry land that shakes or yields under the foot; or (ii) a difficult, precarious, or entrapping position;

Things at the moment are tedious and boring, so instead of complaining about something just to make up a blog post…I’ll say nothing (or next to nothing). Which by the way, I happen to have an endless supply of irritants in my life…or maybe it’s just my surly outlook on life…nope not possible. Why?  Because I’ve started to take a new multi-vitamin…and the labeling can’t lie.   

Now that the craziness of the holiday season is almost behind us, I’m hoping to get back into the blogging state of mind. With everything else going on these days, it’s been hard to keep up. My Christmas shopping is done and wrapped. Thank goodness for small miracles. I’ve been second guessing a couple of the purchases. Not that I’ve overspent on them, I’m just not 100% convinced they will be appreciated as much as I feel they should be. Oh well, I’m not dwelling on it because it’s the thought that counts – right? About 4 weeks ago, J and I ordered new living room furniture for Christmas. Only one piece was being customized with different fabric, but we refused to pay a delivery charge twice, so we’re now expecting it to be delivered in time for Valentine’s Day. It seemed like a good idea at the time. The Gigantic Craft Show has come and gone. After all my hard work, I’m happy to say I made money. Not enough to retire, but enough to call it a success. Will I do the same s...

Murphy’s Law is an old adage that is typically stated as: “Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.” Well, I’ve been living the law of Murphy and I’m not sure what I’ve done to bring on the flood of bad luck I’m having at the moment this year.  Who the hell is Murphy anyway? I’ve never really been one to believe in luck. Luck to me has always been a mindset and if you believe bad things will happen to you, they most likely will. The same goes - if you think positively, positive things will happen. Well, at the moment I’m thinking happy thoughts and all that’s raining upon me has been doom and gloom. In January, I put my car in the ditch and subsequent car repairs we needed. In February, J’s dad required heart surgery and although, he’s alive (thank God) – he’s far from doing fine. He’s been plagued with mystery infections and a very slow recovery. In February, my grandfather passed away. Nothing more to say there. In early March, additional car r...

Yes, this is me today...  My boss and co-workers are extremely grumpy today and their mood is spreading.

I don’t know a better way to explain it, but I’m feeling slightly overwhelmed by life at the moment. Perhaps it’s the fact that reality is setting in again and I’m coming to the conclusion that I’m not actually an international jet-setter, living the high life of luxury in exotic places around the globe. Since getting back, I’m having a hard time adjusting. My sleep patterns are off, my eating patterns are off, my thought processes are off, work makes me want to jam a fork in my eye on a daily basis. In order to avoid the overwhelming urge of throwing office products, spewing profanities and screaming “you want a piece of me” at my co-workers, I have to sit in my office with the door close and try not to make eye contact when anyone walks by. It’s bad. I have plenty to be thankful for, but I’m not feeling any love at the moment. Instead I’m feeling bitter and resentful. To what? I have no idea – I just am. I think I need some time to regroup and get my act together,...

For those of you that have followed along for some time, you know that I don’t like the winter months and although we haven’t experienced a rough winter, it still hasn’t changed my mood. I tend to feel like a hibernating bear - I don’t want to go outside, I want to sleep all day, I’m happy eating excess amounts of food and generally, I’m cranky when disturbed or put out in anyway. Even the ringing of the telephone sends my crank-o-meter into the “danger” zone. I’d been thinking that perhaps I need some socialization to make me feel better and to help me snap out of this funk. I even went so far as “throwing out” a few dates to friends to come over for dinner. Honestly, I was relieved when the dates I suggested didn’t work for the friends because the idea of planning a dinner party and socializing was starting to make me second guess my good nature (aka…it was making me cranky). Just like the winter, I know this moodiness will pass. It always does, but until then…I need a...

I’ve said it before – I hate friggin Winter and I’m not coping with it at the moment…AT ALL.   For the last two months, in my part of Canada, we have been experiencing “lower than seasonable temperatures”.   Well, what does that mean?   Besides the obvious – I need a holiday. Well it means that not only is it colder than usual, it also means that my hands, legs, arms and face have lost all moisture.   I itch everywhere.   My lips are chapped and my hair is brittle.   I’m a mess and sadly I don’t care what I look like when I go out in public.   Between too many clothes, boots, oversized parkas, mittens, scarves, hats and my lizard-like complexion, no one will recognize me and really if they do – I don’t care.   I’d flip them off if it wasn’t impossible to do while wearing mittens.   Somehow, the intensity of the gesture is lost when I’m standing there waving madly with my pink mittens. Don’t get me w...

Saying I woke up on the wrong side of the bed would be an understatement.  My mood says I woke up under the bed, with the dust bunnies. I'm cranky bitchy.   Don't ask me why.  Who the hell knows.  Who the hell cares.  I know it and I'm dealing with it (in my own way).  My mother used to say if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.  So with that little tidbit, I leave you with this (it made me smile - yesterday).     

J has been with the same company for 8 years now and has been having some ongoing issues with his boss.   His boss is and always has been a dictator, know it all and over all pain in the ass.   J is very easy-going and usually can let things roll off his back, but lately it’s getting to him and he’s bringing his dark moods home with him.   He’s lost total interest in his hobbies, exercise, etc. and basically sits on the couch, watching television and sighing a lot. *sigh* I of all people, understand bad times at work.   Hell, I could write a whole book on jack-off bosses and bat shit crazy co-workers.     I’ve been patient, I’ve been supportive.   I’ve even told him to quit, that we will manage, but my patience are failing.   My motto is “get the hell out if you aren’t happy”, so why the hell is he not listening to me?    J and I are different in that, I embrace change.   He’s a little more reluctant to take chan...

Everything is boring today - my job, my co-workers and even (*gasp*) my lunch...

“Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.” Bill Watterson I’m lonely, but am not alone. I love, but do not like. I care, but not enough. My heart aches, but it’s not broken. I’m loved by many, but appreciated by few. I long for respect, but it’s not forthcoming. I’m a body, but not a person. I speak, but am not heard. I want peace and solitude for friends, family, but most of all…for myself. I wish for more, accept less than I should, but am thankful for what I have…most of the time. Tomorrow is a new day…