Journey & Adventure

This was sent to me today and I just had to share - I bet you can relate…enjoy! As we progress into 2013, I want to thank you all for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery. I can no longer open a bathroom door without using a paper towel, nor let the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel. I can't sit down on a hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed. I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one's nose. Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years. I can't touch any woman's handbag for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public toilet. I must send my special thanks for the email abou...

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE technology - when it’s not inconveniencing or annoying me. It has simplified many tasks in my daily routine, but at the same time – it has added so many complications. I like how I can check my e-mail from anywhere, receive text messages from family and friends, update my website remotely, check weather, find directions – all while being on the move, but at the same time, I dislike all of those things. I’m a slave to technology and not proud of it. I dislike how I’m expected to respond immediately to e-mails and text messages. No matter where we are, we can be found, we can be hounded and we can be pestered. I like the “good ole days” – when you left the house, no one could find you find you until you wanted to be found. No one knew where you were going or where you had been.  Life was simple... Just because we have the technology to annoy instantaneously, doesn’t mean it should be used that way. Those who need to get a hold of m...

I was sent this in a e-mail today and thought I'd share a chuckle with you... TRUTH My Favorite Animal Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed. My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA. He said they love animals very much. I do,too. Especially chicken, pork and beef. Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal's office. I told him what happened, and he laughed,too. Then he told me not to do it again. The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite live animal was. I told her it was chicken. She asked me why, so I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken. She sent me back to the principal's office. He laughed, and told me not ...

I’ve never thought myself to be OCD in anyway, but lately I find myself consumed with my e-mail inbox. You see, I use my inbox as a sort of “to-do” list. If a matter needs to be dealt with, it stays in my inbox until it’s either been dealt with by me or had become someone else’s problem. Once it’s been addressed, it gets moved out of the inbox and into a customer specific folder. Out of sight, out of mind.  Life is good, but... Around my workplace, it’s like a big ole game of “hot potato”. Something comes in and of course, it needs to be dealt with ASAP. Sending a response to the person immediately is the ideal course of action, but lately, I’ve noticed a new mentality forming around here. I like to call it a “stall tactic” and my boss is the king of such tactics. If you ask him a question, you will get at least three questions in return and at least one of them will send you off on a wild goose chase…to places unknown, where no one has gone before and no one will go again. ...

Dear Friends, Just as the New Year begins, I wanted to thank you for the emails you have forwarded over the past year. I must send a big thank you to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes, because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing. Also, I now have to wipe the top of every can I open for the same reason. I no longer have any savings because I gave it all to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time. But that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft is sending me for participating in their special email programs. Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants me to split seven million dollars with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died intestate. I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me. I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward emails to seven friends and make a wish within five ...

Vacations are a double edged sword – they are great when you are on them, but when you come back, you are made to “pay” for taking time off. I have 107 unread e-mails in my inbox and at least 75 of them are marked with that red exclamation mark indicating they are “urgent”. Does anyone actually think putting the exclamation mark on them is going to make me read them any quicker? It’s great to come back to work only to be greeted by an e-mail from the CEO saying “thanks for all your hard work this year, but no one is getting a raise”. I am not surprised by this and am just thankful to have a job at all, but getting that e-mail still sucks. While I was away, my local radio station had changed its usual format to “all Christmas music, all the time”. WTH? Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy Christmas music but NOT in November and NOT every damn song. There was something about hearing Alvin and The Chipmunks that almost sent me postal this morning. ...